Ep 2 - Understanding my Human Design

Episode Summary

In this episode, Sarah dives into her own human design chart and how it has impacted her life and business. She discusses being a Generator type, her open and defined energy centers, and some of the inherent contradictions and complexities within her chart.

Key Topics Covered

- Sarah's Generator type and undefined Root center
- Her open Ajna and Crown centers and how this manifests
- Her defined G Center, Sacral Center, and Emotional Solar Plexus
- The Channel of Connection (Channel 6-59) and how this shows up in her work
- Learning to accept and honor her emotional waves
- Holding space for clients as a coach with her potent emotional energy

Notable Quotes

"I don't necessarily have that internal go, go, go, push, push, push."

"I can achieve loads of things, but I don't necessarily have that internal drive."

"I'm very consistent. I know who I am. I know where I'm headed 99% of the time."

"I am responsible quite often for triggering emotions in others."

About Sarah’s Human Design Chart

As a Generator type, Sarah has a consistent inner authority and ability to respond to life's demands. However, with an undefined Root center, she doesn't have strong inner drive and can lose motivation.

Her open Ajna and Crown centers cause her to be inconsistent in how she thinks and approaches big picture ideas. She is always seeking inspiration.

The defined centers in her chart (G, Sacral, Emotional Solar Plexus) make her very in touch with her sense of self, creative energies, and emotions.

The Channel of Connection (6-59) brings an intensity to her emotional awareness and bonds with others. This affects her coaching work deeply.

Connect With Sarah

Website: www.sarahatkinsdesign.com

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Transcript

Sarah Atkins: 0:20

Welcome to the Energetics of Being, a human design podcast. The podcast that delves into the fascinating world of human design and unravels the layers of conditioning, beliefs, and expectations that can influence who we become and how we show up in our lives. I'm your host, Sarah Atkins, and I am so excited to share this journey with you. This podcast is a sanctuary for those who are tired of feeling stuck, held back, or disconnected from their true selves. We'll shine a light on the patterns and behaviors that prevent you from fully expressing your authentic essence and uncover the tools, insights, and practices that can empower you to release the limitations that no longer serve. We'll tap into the power of energy, intuition, and self awareness to unlock your true potential so that you can live a life that aligns with your authentic self. Join me each week as we engage in thought provoking conversations with experts, practitioners, and individuals who have experienced their own profound transformations. We'll explore topics such as human design, gene keys, astrology, holistic approaches, coaching, neuroscience, and psychology, drawing from a rich tapestry of wisdom to help you navigate your own personal journey of self discovery. Whether you're new to human design or have been on a path of self discovery for years, this podcast is for you. It's a space of exploration, growth, and inspiration, an invitation to step into your power, embrace your uniqueness, and create a life that resonates with your soul's deepest desires. So if you're ready, let's dive in. Hello, my loves and welcome to episode two of the Energetics of Being Human Design Podcast. And today I thought I would just dive in a little bit about my own human design. And how it has kind of impacted me to sort of understanding my chat. And it's really interesting actually because I'm coming into this episode straight off of the back of doing a guest expert slot at the Bath of Northeast Somerset Business Show down at Bath University, where I was an guest expert on neurodiversity, and one of the things that always comes up when we're talking about neurodivergence we're sort of helping employers understand and, managers how to understand their neurodivergent employees, it always comes down to individuality. There isn't a one size fits all approach when you're dealing with a neurodivergent profile. Because, and I don't wanna get into the details on this particular episode, but there are lots of different nuances even within a neuro divergent profile. That's one of the reasons we use neurodivergent as a term because it's a, it's an umbrella term and it doesn't go into like, oh, that person's autistic or that person's A D H D because we are made up of lots of different things. And quite often, especially in the work that I do with my neurodivergent clients, it's not as straightforward as just somebody being dyslexic or somebody being autistic. There's quite a lot of Other things that go on. And a lot of these neurodivergent conditions can be comorbid or they may experience some of these many different symptoms. And certainly when we went through the diagnosis with my eldest son, they said there's not one particular thing. There's lots of different aspects and elements that kind of go together to create his neurodivergent profile. And the same can be said with human design. So, and I think I mentioned this before, like human design is not meant to be a limiting thing, it was never meant to be that. That's why it draws from so many different modalities because it isn't a one size fits all approach. So if you are new to human design, I really want you to open up your mind and not see yourself as, I am a generator, or I am a projector, or I can't do this because I'm a manifester. And you know, that's just how it is. Certainly there are aspects of your design that are general characteristics, but equally, I've worked with a lot of clients, I've worked with projectors who don't feel like they're projectors, they behave and they act like generators Equally, I've worked with generators who were utterly convinced that they're manifesting generators which is fine. Just because I tell that person that actually this is what they were designed to be. There are so many different elements within your charts that enable you to access energy and one generator is not the same as another generator. So please don't think that it is about labeling. It's not about labeling. It's not about putting you inside a box that you can only do these certain things. What it is, is a conversation opener. It's a place to explore. It's a place to kind of understand all those little quirks and those nuances and maybe give a bit of reasoning as to behind the why you do what you do or why you think the way you do or why you have tendencies towards a certain thing. But again, the same can be said for life experience. There may be I've certainly worked with a client in particular who had a defined throat center, so in theory they're consistent in their voice because that's what their chart says. However, we did a lot of work. Around actually, they don't speak up. They don't necessarily share everything that they want to say because they fear. There's other things going on with them from their past experiences. They've been closed down. They've had these experiences that have then made them feel unsafe about expressing their energy. So, Going sort of on like my own chart and why I like human design was never meant to be part of my business plan. It just wasn't, it wasn't even a thing when I started, but why has it become part of my business plan now? I. The reason, the main reason is because of how many kind of aha moments I had through how I do my business. And I realized that actually there's some, there is some real power in this. There's power in knowledge. There are some bits of my chart that I feel massively uncomfortable with and I don't resonate with some of them, and I think that's okay. With any of these kind of modalities, you need to have a light touch. You need to have an open mind. You need to be willing to ask the questions, and if you don't resonate with something, maybe explore why. Because that, in that very thing, there's some learning, there's some. Not necessarily like, oh, this is wrong, and I don't agree with it. I don't mean that. What I mean is okay, I don't resonate with that, but maybe why, why do I do, why do I not connect with that particular aspect? I have to say from my own point of view, there was more that I probably connected with than not. And it's interesting'cause actually a lot of my. Channels and gates are unconscious. And those are the bits that actually, weirdly, I received the information much better in a much more positive way because I think there was a part of me that kind of knew this inner knowing. It's like, oh no, I do know that about myself, but I don't use it. I. Consciously prevent myself feeling that way or doing that way or acting in that way. So I started digging into that, which was quite interesting, sort of with my own chart. So I'll just share some of the sort of top line bits about my chart and my human design. So first of all, I am a generator type in quantum human design terms that is an alchemist. One of the key things around that was that I discovered the strategy for generator types is to respond. And I was like, oh, okay. Because I've gone through my entire life being told I can make things happen and there is a weird, element to me that when I put my mind to something, I a hundred percent will follow through and I will make things happen. However, when I started digging into it and I was like, okay, well I don't actually make all things happen, so I then started exploring the things that, when things have worked out, what's different when things haven't worked out, like what's the energetics behind that? Did I have any inkling, did I know that that was gonna happen and am I more selective about where I apply my energy? So I started exploring and delving into that, which is really interesting for me. And when I just started digging into my human design, I was relatively new into business. I'd only been in it for about a year, probably full time. And I was so frustrated, so frustrated because I was doing all of the things I had done. I'd signed up to a couple of programs, turned out to be a massive waste of money because they, I, when I say a massive waste of money, they're a massive waste of money for me because their strategies, their ways of doing things absolutely probably worked for them. I didn't quite know myself well enough to realize that they weren't gonna work for me. And I guess that's where I'm coming from in the fact that I was searching for the perfect plan, the perfect way to do things, the perfect strategy, because. As an entrepreneur, I was very new into the world. I didn't really fully trust myself. I didn't really trust that I knew how to do things or like, I felt really out of my comfort zone. So this plays out in particular because I have an undefined or open crown Center, open and undefined ajna. center. So I have no activations here at all, and I have an open and undefined Root center. So all of these things mean that I, when I'm out of my comfort zone, I reach out to other people. I reach out to other energy fields, I look for inspiration. However, I can go too far and I can get sucked into this analysis paralysis, and I forget to draw a line or draw a boundary. And I take in so much information, I end up being overwhelmed and then I don't know where to start and I search for answers outside of myself. So that's when I would sign up for a program'cause I would've done all the research. I've got overwhelmed by it, not know which way to go see somebody who's clearly smashing it like a business mentor or a business coach. Think, oh, well, they've obviously got the answers. And then I would put all my trust in them and then I would get frustrated because, It didn't work for me. Now, I'm not, this isn't to say that group programs aren't great. I think they are, but I do think there needs to be an element of autonomy. There needs to be an element, almost like a pick and mix kind of aspect to them where, again, holding their strategies with a light touch. And I guess maybe this is my inner teacher coming out, differentiation. Adapting those methods, looking for alternatives. But because I was new into this kind of industry and the people that I was putting my faith in and trying to learn from, they just had one method and they just had one way because that was the way that they worked, that worked for them. They hadn't taken into account or hadn't even considered. What else might work for other people? And a hundred percent that's not their, oh, that's my responsibility. I should have asked the questions. I should have not trusted so blindly. Understanding that about myself enabled me to stop feeling like a victim, effectively feeling like I was being taken advantage. Because it's very easy. I mean, in coaching transactional analysis, we have this tool called the Drama Triangle, and I had very much fallen into that kind of victim mode. Like, woe is me, it's not working for me. I. And I wasn't blaming them, I was blaming myself. I was beating myself with a massive self-deprecating stick of, why can't you do that? You are so useless. It works for everybody else. And it's interesting, isn't it?'cause in a group program, and I had this conversation recently. I do like a group program, however it comes with a caveat. Because if it's too big or too busy with too many people and too much going on, then I get overwhelmed and when I get overwhelmed, I retreat. When I see other people doing so well, I feel left behind. I don't necessarily use that as a motivating factor. It actually stops me from making progress. Whereas if I feel like I am being nurtured and I'm managing to keep up with everybody, I'm much more likely to follow through. Which is funny'cause again, that comes up in my human design. I have an undefined Root center so I can achieve loads of things, but I don't necessarily have that internal go, go, go, push, push, push. I don't have that. Necessarily, and I can very easily get swept up in the current with everybody else. However, I have so much openness in my chart. Even as a generator type, I can't sustain it. So if, if everybody is kind of racing on a hundred miles an hour and I get too far behind, I will just drop off. I'll drop off a cliff. So again, one of these things that, there was another thing that I kind of learned about myself. So I started being a bit more selective about what was worth my time, what I knew would work for me. And I spent a long time actually stepping out of programs and learning and going inwards, reflecting on where I'm at, where are my gaps? What do I need? And so tho those were areas where I struggled with my inconsistency. So Crown Ajna Root Center, which leads me onto things that I can rely on, which is my G Center. I have a defined G center. It's my center of gravity. It's my personality. It's the core of who I am. I'm very consistent. I know who I am. I know where I'm headed 99% of the time. I know when I am heading off track, because I get this kind of inner pull, it's really hard to explain. Those of you that do have a defined G center or self-center will kind of recognize it in yourself. Things will start feeling a bit anxious and a bit like something doesn't feel right, but you can't quite put your finger on it. And that is almost like my inner guidance Now. I knew that about myself, but I. Could never have, I would never have been able to articulate it very well prior to understanding about my human design. So those are sort of things that I can definitely lean on. The other thing is my defined sacral center, which makes me generator a type effectively. Which is all about channeling creative energy. I am creative. I can turn my hand pretty much to anything. When I'm creating, I get so into it, I love it, and I will lose track of time, and that doesn't really matter what I'm doing. So whether it's painting, sewing, cooking, food, Baking, learning new recipes, whether it's doing a bit of problem solving, whether it's mind mapping a new idea, whether it's writing a blog post or an article or things like that, I can totally get immersed in it to the point where it almost, sometimes it can be a bit of an issue because my husband has definitely come upstairs before at like one, two o'clock in the morning going, are you coming to bed or not? I'm like, oh my God, and I'll lose track of time because I'm really into what I'm doing. So again, understanding that about myself, and I did recognize that one of the things that I didn't necessarily recognize though was my defined emotional center. I don't think I'm that emotional or I never did. I don't. Well I say that I feel I'm very empathetic and I can feel, and I can put myself in somebody else's shoes. However, I don't necessarily outwardly express them. So when I say I'm not overly emotional, people probably wouldn't necessarily know, I don't give away a huge amount. But inside I'm like the archetypal swan, like everything is going on underneath the surface. It's not externalized. Now, one of the things that I didn't realize is that with the defined emotional center, I am responsible quite often for triggering emotions in others. Because other people, if I, if I, you know, if I'm surrounded in a room of empaths with open emotional centers, they may be feeling my big emotions that I am internalizing and they may not realize. So I could quite often find myself in the middle of quite a volatile situation and I'd be getting really angry and really frustrated, but I wouldn't. Outwardly express it, but everyone else around me is reflecting it back at me and I'm like, whoa, where's this coming from? And actually now I know is that they're picking up on my inner rage, shall we say. Which can be quite tricky.'cause funnily enough, and I'll talk about family dynamics in another episode, but my husband is an empath. He's undefined. And so are two of my three children. So I have had to really lean into much more of my emotional intelligence, rather than just kind of going on with my day to day, I check in with myself, like, how am I feeling? I do that on a daily basis. Am I feeling good? I just, I literally just have an app on my phone where I track my emotional state effectively. Like, am I feeling energized? Am I feeling tired? Am I feeling melancholy? The key thing is with this though, is that I honor how I feel. Just for feeling the way I feel. I no longer look for a logical reason because quite often I used to, and this is prior to knowing this about myself. I would, I was very much brought up by the kind of keep calm, carry on generation where, Which makes complete sense. I mean, because of their history. My parents were baby boomers, my grandparents lived through two world wars. So we were all about, and I was from a very working class background. So it was all about like not wallowing in self-pity, just pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and carry on. I've got time to worry about that. So. That's how I was brought up. And I know I used to think this was just me, but actually I know it's like generations of people sort of born in the sixties, seventies, and eighties that were all brought up by that same generation and we didn't really, I. I get encouraged to kind of share how we feel about something. It was like, oh, you know, that's pants. Let's just move on. carry on. Don't wallow in it. And I don't think I ever really honored it. It was never that. I was never told that sharing emotion, emotion is bad. But that's what I made of it. That's my interpretation. So this isn't a criticism of how I was brought up. It's just interesting of what, because it becomes what I made of it, if that makes sense. So I, it's how I have responded to my environment, the people around me, and it's, you know, and this is again another example of how we can't put everybody into a, oh, you are a defined emotional center box because. It, it very much depends on how you were brought up, the circles that you mixed in, what schools you went to what mentors or role models that you had around you as to how safe you felt. How okay. It felt to express those things. So I've had to kind of really understand my own emotional wave to recognize that actually sometimes I will wake up and I'm just on a massive high. I have no idea why. I just feel really up because that's where my emotional wave is. Following that I might have a massive dip, no logical reason. I just have a dip and an emotional low. I have low energy. Can't be bothered to get out of bed. And again, we are conditioned to find a reason behind it, whereas actually now I don't and I honor my emotional wave much better. And just accept and then tune into what I need. Do I need a bit of alone time? Do I need to have a slow day? Do I need to sit down quietly and read? Do I need to jump up and down and dance, have kitchen disco or whatever? Or do I need to go for a run or a walk like a brisk walk. So I, I'm much more in tune with what my needs are in line with my emotional wave. So all of these things kind of feed into how I started showing up differently in work because, or in my business, because as a coach, I have to hold space for my clients. And one of the things that I started noticing, especially with the emotional center, Is that quite a lot of my clients would get quite emotional in our sessions, even though they hadn't felt necessarily emotional to start off with. And it might be a particular question that I asked or a topic that we started exploring that they hadn't expected to kind of come up. And initially I used to kind of, I used to really worry that I was upsetting people. And then I dug in deeper into my human design and discovered I have the channel of connection, which is to do with my defined emotional center, but it connects my gate six which is in my emotional solar plexus into my sacral center, which is Gate 59. And this channel is quite potent in terms of, Connecting, reaching into people even when people aren't, don't feel necessarily that they are emotional about something or nothing really triggers them. My 6 59 channel in the way that I communicate, in the way that I ask questions. I remember having a session a couple of years ago with a client. And they were like, wow, like it's 30 minutes. I had no idea we were gonna go so deep, so quickly. And it's purely because that's the energy that I bring into the coaching space. So I have had to really learn how to hold that space, how to. Not manage.'cause I'm not responsible for the people's emotions, but I have to feel comfortable with holding that safe space, creating that safe space where people feel that they can share and explore. I've had to do additional training around trauma responses just so that I felt better equipped to hold that space because. Sometimes my line of questioning can like really trigger people. And like I said, I no longer take that really personally. What I'm doing is actually I'm a catalyst for stuff that was already there. But what it does is I bring that stuff into the open, obviously from a safe point of view and making sure that they're happy to bring that out. And then when I do, that's one of the reasons my coaching style can be so Transformational. Really, I suppose because we get to the nub of what's really going on, like we find out a thing behind the thing, and I now see that as like one of my coaching superpowers, which I didn't really know how to use before digging into my human design, sort of really exploring that. The other aspect of this connection channel is that it is what? It's one of what we would call one of the, it's a bit of a. How do I call it? It's about making deep connections with it is, it's a fertile channel, I suppose. So it is like a creation channel if you think about that, because of its connection to the sacral center. So whilst I am not here to make things happen, I can like respond in a generator way. What I can do is I bring that creative energy. I am a natural co-creator, not necessarily meant to create on my own. I'm great as part of a team, and in that partnership, like working with my clients, I co-create, I partner with them, so I. Some people love working with me. Other people really don't like what I end up catalyzing in that space. And again, I've had to really kind of come to terms with that. I'm not for everybody and that's okay. And that was one of the things that I really struggled with the most. I think because I have a lot of attachment. A lot of personal attachment into like, I want to be liked, I don't want people to not like me. So that can, that has been a bit of a challenge for me to kind of work through. So you can see there are lots of different aspects and layers to your chart. I've just talked a bit about my energy type. I've talked a little bit about some of my defined and undefined centers and I've only shared one of my channels with you. I mean, I could go on forever. There's so much information. But if you are curious about your own human design, I do offer one-to-one chart readings. I can share a link in the show notes below this. If you've got any questions, like I love, like I've already just shared with you, I love connecting with people, please do just drop me an email or you can find me on social media, on Instagram or Facebook. I'd also love to invite you, if you want more of these kind of conversations, come and join my Facebook group, the energetics of Being. And we can carry on the conversation in there. So feel free to ask any questions. Again, I'll share in the show notes below this how you can join my Facebook group. It is free. It's where I hang out. It's where you can ask questions about all things human design. So yeah, I'd love to see you there. Take care, and I'll see you again next time. Thank you for joining me on this episode of the Energetics of Being. I hope you found our exploration today, both insightful and inspiring, and if you resonated with what you heard today, I invite you to subscribe, rate, and review this podcast on your preferred platform, whatever that might be. Your feedback is really invaluable and it helps us to reach even more listeners on their own journey of self-discovery. And remember, the conversation doesn't have to end here. You can connect with me on social media. I'm on Instagram under the handle sarah m atkins. Or you can find me on Facebook just as Sarah Atkins. You could even come and join my Facebook group, The Energetics of Being where you can share your thoughts, questions, or your own personal experiences. I would really love to hear from you and continue our conversation there. I am on a personal mission to bring you thought provoking conversations and practical insights to help you break free from the conditioning that holds you back, allowing your true self to shine brilliantly. And as we close out this episode, take a moment to reflect on what you've learned today. How can you apply these insights to your own life? What steps can you take to further align with your own authentic self? Thank you again for listening. I really do appreciate you choosing to spend some time with me. And until next time, remember that you are a unique once in a lifetime expression of the universe. Embrace your individuality, trust your inner wisdom, and keep shining your light brightly. Take care, and we'll catch you in the next episode of The Energetics of being. Stay curious, stay authentic, and stay true to you.